Journal Article Review

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© 2016 by the American Counseling Association. All rights reserved.

Received 12/29/14 Revised 09/29/15

Accepted 10/07/15 DOI: 10.1002/johc.12030

Overwhelmed With the Burden of Being Myself:

A Phenomenological Exploration of the Existential Experiences of

Counselors-in-Training

L. Marinn Pierce

s s s

Little research exists about the lived experiences of counselors-in-training during their

practicum and internship experiences. The results of a phenomenological study exploring

the existential experiences of counselors-in-training are presented. Implications for counselor

development and supervision, as well as needs for future research and exploration, are discussed.

Keywords: existential, counselor development, internship, supervision

s s s

Rogers (1961) noted that the humanity of the counselor is the most important tool in the counseling session, and other theorists and researchers (Glad- ding, 1997; Guy, 1987; Patterson & Einsenberg, 1983) have supported this view. Therefore, it can be assumed that increased personal understanding of the self, or self-awareness, is an integral and foundational part of the development of the professional counselor. This belief in the importance of the humanity of the counselor is evident in the increased emphasis on personal dispositions in the ongoing assessment of counselors-in-training (American Counseling Association, 2014; Pierce, 2010). There are a vari- ety of ways to support counselors-in-training in their self-exploration in both academic and experiential settings, and much literature has been produced regarding how counselor educators can support the develop- ment of counselors-in-training. Various theorists of counselor development have addressed the progress of the counseling supervisee from a place of dependence on the supervisor to increased independence from the su- pervisor (Skovholt & Rønnestad, 1995; Stoltenberg, McNeill, & Delworth, 1998). Although these models provide a framework for understanding the

L. Marinn Pierce, Department of Counselor Education and Rehabilitation, California State University, Fresno. This author would like to thank Alexandra K. Holt and Candice Newsum for their assistance with this study. Correspondence concerning this article should be addressed to L. Marinn Pierce, Department of Counselor Education and Rehabilitation, California State University, Fresno, 5005 North Maple Avenue, Fresno, CA 93740 (e-mail: lpierce@csufresno.edu).

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development of the emerging counselor, they fail to address the personal experiences of developing counselors. Without an understanding of the intimate existential crises experienced by supervisees, counseling supervi- sors potentially neglect the personal struggles that counselors-in-training encounter as a result of the professional growth experience. An increased understanding of the lived experiences of counselors-in-training related to the existential experiences they encounter during their practicum and/ or internship experiences can enhance the quality and depth of counselor supervision. The purpose of this study was to explore specifically the ex- istential experiences of counselors-in-training during the practicum and/ or internship experiences.

Literature revieW

Counseling Supervision

Counseling supervision is a hierarchical, evaluative relationship between counseling professionals and a supervisor, through which these counseling professionals develop skills, gain knowledge, and increase self-awareness and understanding (Bernard & Goodyear, 2009). Bernard (1997) identi- fied three areas of foci for counseling supervision: intervention skills (how supervisees respond in session), conceptualization skills (how supervisees understand what is occurring in session and how they determine what in- terventions to use), and personalization skills (how supervisees address issues of countertransference and how they integrate their personal selves into the counseling session). On the basis of a review of the literature, Falender (2014) found that counselors place a greater emphasis on intervention and conceptualization skills.

Several theories and models of counselor development exist to support the practice and implementation of counselor education (Bernard & Good- year, 2009; Borders & Brown, 2005; Haynes, Corey, & Moulton, 2003). Aten, Strain, and Gillespie (2008) proposed a transtheoretical model of clinical supervision based on the stages of change model (Prochaska & Norcross, 2001). In this approach, supervisees proceed through a series of stages of change, and supervisors use various interventions, known as processes, which are either experiential or behavioral, to support supervisees’ growth across the stages of change. Aten et al. noted that supervisees experience anxiety during the contemplation and action stages and that, while in the contemplation stage, supervisees experience heightened awareness about their roles and performance. This awareness leads to anxiety as well as ambivalence. The experience of supervisees in the action stage is similar; however, the anxiety is related to the use of newly developed skills.

The integrated developmental model (Stoltenberg et al., 1998) is probably the most recognized of the developmental approaches to counselor development. Stoltenberg et al. (1998) described counselors as developing across three overriding structures: (a) self and other

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awareness, (b) motivation, and (c) autonomy. These counselors develop across three levels within eight specific domains: (a) intervention skills competence, (b) assessment techniques, (c) interpersonal assessment, (d) client conceptualization, (e) individual differences, (f) theoretical orientation, (g) treatment plans and goals, and (h) professional ethics. Level 1 counselors have limited first-hand knowledge or experience of the domain in question. Although they are highly motivated, these counselors are also highly reliant on the supervisor for guidance and approval and tend to be focused on their own inadequacies. Although Level 2 counselors are more focused on the client, they are in a place of fluctuation between dependence on supervisors and their own indepen- dence. They can, at times, become overly focused on the client and lose sight of themselves. Level 3 counselors are confident in their abilities, including the knowledge of when to reach out for consultation. Level 3 counselors continue this development across their professional careers, and this continuation is noted as Level 3i, or the integrated counselor. These individuals effectively integrate their abilities across the eight domains within the three structures (Stoltenberg et al., 1998).

Several of these theories address supervisee anxiety. The source of this anxiety is described as the fear of being observed and evaluated, and anxiety is viewed as a positive opportunity for growth in the course of counseling supervision. Thus, counseling supervisors face the challenge of balancing their supervisees’ anxieties, which they increase, with support and encouragement (Borders & Brown, 2005). Borders and Brown (2005) identified that supervisees experience two primary types of anxiety: state anxiety and trait anxiety. State anxiety refers to the anxiety that supervisees experience given their current developmental level, their amount of counseling experience, and the difficulty of their presenting clients. At the same time, supervisees enter the supervision experience with a preexisting propensity toward anxiety, which is known as trait anxiety (Borders & Brown, 2005). The means by which supervisors address both state and trait anxieties is dependent on the theoretical orientation of the supervisor (Bernard & Goodyear, 2009).

Theoretical approaches to understanding counselor development, rooted in traditional counseling theories, are also used in the supervision process (Aten et al., 2008). These approaches seem to be used primarily for teaching counselors-in-training to use the theoretical approaches in question (Aten et al., 2008; Connell, 1984; Cummings, 1992; Farber, 2012; Rowan, 2006), and Chang (2013) noted that the practice of integrating a counseling theoretical model in the supervision process is diminishing. At the same time, other scholars presented ways of using counseling theories in the supervision process. Burnes, Wood, Inman, and Welikson (2013) described the impact of process factors present during feminist group supervision experiences, and Degges-White, Colon, and Borzumato-Gainey (2013) provided a framework

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for the use of feminist theory in supervision. Theoretical approaches pro- vide not only interventions to promote counselor development but also a means of understanding the process of counselor development beyond those provided by stage models.

These theoretical approaches to counselor development and supervision provide a framework for understanding the process of a counselor-in-training moving from a place of dependence to increased independence (Aten et al., 2008; Skovholt & Rønnestad, 1995; Stoltenberg et al., 1998). Although these models offer a developmental understanding of the professional counselor, they do not consider the personal experiences of counselors-in-training. An existential approach to counselor development is a framework from which counselor educators can begin to understand the intimate personal awareness that counselors-in-training experience as a result of their profes- sional development.

An Existential Understanding of a Counselor’s Developmental Experience

Arising as a reaction to the psychoanalytic and behaviorist ideologies, an existential understanding of human beings emphasizes the existence of individuals. Drawing from philosophical works such as those of Søren Ki- erkegaard, Friedrich Nietzsche, and Jean-Paul Sartre, Maslow (1968), one of the first theorists to present existentialism as a psychotherapeutic approach in the United States, noted two main emphases of existentialism: the focus on the identity of the individual and the phenomenological nature of the approach. Frankl (2000), Maslow (1968), and May (1983) noted that other theorists, namely Carl Rogers and Gordon Allport, placed emphasis on these areas as well; however, from an existential perspective, an increased awareness of identity and existence leads to an increased responsibility for the individual’s existence. Existential theorists argued that this “inner nature” (Maslow, 1968, p. 3) is simultaneously individual and universal because this inner nature is unique to the individual, yet each individual possesses an inner nature. Various terms are used to describe this inner nature: being, essence, existence, and self (Frankl, 2000; Maslow, 1968; May, 1983).

As individuals gain increased awareness of their existence, their aware- ness of the possibility of nonexistence also increases, which creates anxi- ety. May (1983) stated, “Anxiety is the subjective state of the individual’s becoming aware that his existence can become destroyed, that he can lose himself and his world, that he can become ‘nothing’” (pp. 109–110). The process of counselor development places emphasis on self-awareness and reflection. From an existential perspective, the process of becoming a pro- fessional counselor is inherently anxiety producing, not only because of the academic and clinical evaluation of the student as previously described but also because the counselor-in-training is continually asked to increase awareness of the self. May (1983) stated further,

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anxiety always involves inner conflict. . . . anxiety occurs at the point where some emerging potentiality or possibility faces the individual, some possibility of fulfilling his existence; but this very possibility involves the destroying of present security, which thereupon gives rise to the tendency to deny the new potentiality. (p. 111)

Maslow (1968) noted that anxiety is also generated through encounters with the human suffering of others, which can bring individuals face-to- face with their own nonbeing.

May (1983) also provided further insight into the effect of the therapeutic relationship on the professional counselor. He noted that in any authentic relationship between individuals, including the counseling relationship, both individuals are changed. Because of this aspect, the encounter of another being can simultaneously generate anxiety and joy, and both of these experiences can lead to change for the individuals involved in the encounter if it leads to increased awareness of the self and responsibility taking. Because of this aspect of the encounter between the counselor and client, existentialists encourage phenomenological exploration of the self rather than assume the presence of transference or countertransference for the client or counselor (May, 1983).

Although existential theorists provided a unique perspective on the experience of the counselor, there exists limited literature regarding the existential experiences of professional counselors beyond the personal, autobiographical writings of leading existential theorists (Frankl, 1997; May, 1983; Yalom, 2012). This limited knowledge base also includes a lim- ited understanding of the impact of these existential experiences on the development of the professional counselor.

MetHod

The following research question was used to guide this study: What are the existential experiences encountered by counselors-in-training during their practicum and/or internship experiences? To answer this question, a heuristic or psychological phenomenological approach, as described by Moustakas (1990, 1994), was used. The aim of any phenomenological study is to explore the lived experiences of individuals related to an identified phenomenon. In this case, the researchers sought to explore the lived, existential experiences of counselors-in-training during their practicum and/or internship experiences.

Data Collection and the Role of the Researcher

The research team consisted of three individuals: the author—a faculty member with training and experience in qualitative research—and two counselor education students, who used the phenomenological data analysis process, as outlined by Moustakas (1990, 1994), in the development and implementation of this study. After receiving institutional review board approval, the research team established the role of the researcher by initiating

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the bracketing process, separating out their own experiences through reviews of writings and reflections on the topic. In addition to this initial bracketing process, the research team recorded all discussions related to the study for further bracketing purposes.

Counselors-in-training who completed their initial practicum experience and identified as having existential experiences during the course of practi- cum and/or internship were recruited. A snowball sampling method was used. Participants completed one interview via phone that was approxi- mately 1 hour in length. All interviews were audiotaped and transcribed for analysis purposes.

In an attempt to honor the phenomenological experiences of participants, all participants were asked one initial question: “What are the existential experiences you encountered as a practicum and/or internship student?” Additional open-ended questions and minimal encouragers were used by the research team to support the participants’ descriptions of their experiences.

Data Analysis

The purpose of phenomenological research is to provide a rich, thick descrip- tion of an identified phenomenon, which, in this case, was the existential experiences of counselors-in-training. The research team continued to use the phenomenological data analysis process as outlined by Moustakas (1990, 1994) to code the collected data by highlighting significant phrases or quotations and establishing clusters of meaning. These clusters were used to develop textural and structural descriptions of the data. In addition, the research team reviewed their own experiences through the bracketing process and meeting recordings. The research team used this data to develop the essence of the existential experiences of participants (Moustakas, 1990, 1994).

Participants

Using snowball sampling, the research team recruited five participants (two women and three men). The five participants consisted of counselors- in-training from various programs throughout the United States who had completed practicum or internship and identified as having existential experiences during these experiential components of their training. Par- ticipants ranged in age from 25 to 35 years. Four participants identified as Caucasian, and one participant identified as Asian.

Limitations

several limitations exist in the use of phenomenological research. First, the very nature of phenomenological research— to describe the lived ex- periences of individuals—limits the generalizability of the findings. This limitation is further compounded by the small numbers of participants in

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phenomenological studies (creswell, 2013). in addition, the use of snowball sampling and voluntary participants also can limit the generalizability of the findings (maxwell, 2005).

Methods of Trustworthiness

The research team used four methods of trustworthiness: triangulation, clari- fying researcher bias, member checks, and a rich-thick description (creswell, 2013). Triangulation was conducted through the use of multiple researchers. The bracketing process and continuing clarification of the researcher’s role provided systematic, ongoing clarification of researcher bias. member check- ing was accomplished by having participants review the outcomes to ensure accuracy. Three of the five participants responded to the request for member checks. One noted that she had nothing to add, but the second stated, “Wow!! Your research is spot on with what i went thru [sic] during graduate school! The whole darn thing. . . . Good work.” a third stated, “i am not surprised at what i read because of the theme of isolation. i think it’s a great example of how insight sometimes provides very little relief from painful emotional reactions. i reckon this is because they are just the painful emotions associated with life, rather than symptoms.” The research team developed a rich-thick description of the phenomenon and the analysis.

resuLts and disCussion

To provide a rich, thick description of the existential experiences of partici- pants, the research team used the phenomenological data analysis process, as outlined by moustakas (1990, 1994), to code the collected data by highlighting significant phrases or quotations and establishing clusters of meaning. Theses codes were used to develop the following structural, textual description of the phenomenon. Five major themes were developed related to the personal experiences of the participants: (a) actually being real; (b) i’m not really de- pressed. it’s more like overwhelmed; (c) questioning of self; (d) worry; and (e) loneliness. Two themes were developed that provided some meditating factors: (a) relationships with program faculty and (b) relationships with program peers. These seven themes are interconnected and affect one another. in addition, they all fell under the overarching theme of overwhelmed with the burden of being myself. Each of these seven themes and the overarching theme are discussed in the following paragraphs.

Actually Being Real

maslow (1968) noted that part of the existential experience is the acknowl- edgment of the differences between what individuals aspire to be and what they are actually capable of given their human limitations. Partici- pants described anxiety related to the reality of transitioning from being

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a counselor-in-training to working as a professional counselor. The reality of the transition seemed to be surprising to participants. This anxiety was present regardless of whether the participant was beginning practicum or completing internship. One participant described the “massive, mas- sive difference” between classroom training experiences and work in the professional setting. He went on to state, “i think it’s kind of put me in a certain place and had me question my belief systems to a certain extent.” although it might seem obvious that anxiety would result from this tran- sition, participants described that the result of this anxiety included an acknowledgment and recognition of their personal limitations, particularly in relation to the magnitude of the work they were doing. One individual acknowledged this recognition by stating, “i did the best i could in that hour,” which is a self-talk statement used to provide encouragement in the presence of personal limitations. inherent in this acknowledgment is the reality of just how much the counselor can effect change for a client. There seemed to be a cyclical nature to this anxiety because the anxiety related to the transition resulted in additional anxiety related to the personal limita- tions of the counselors-in-training.

I’m Not Really Depressed. It’s More Like Overwhelmed.

across the interviews, participants described an emotional exhaustion associated with their practicum and internship experiences. This exhaus- tion was not necessarily associated with the additional time commitment involved in these experiences but rather with the emotional commitment required during these experiences. One participant stated, “i didn’t have the mental energy.” another participant described this exhaustion as be- ing “almost like serving a sentence,” and a third participant described the overwhelming nature when she “accepted the mediocrity” of her work during these learning experiences. it should be noted that this overwhelm- ing feeling did not seem to inhibit their desires to continue in the field of professional counseling, but it was present, and participants were aware of it during the training process. Guilt, as described by may (1983), seemed to be inherent in this overwhelmed experience. Guilt experiences arise as individuals are faced with increased awareness, and therefore responsibil- ity, of their potentialities as well as their personal limitations (Frankl, 2000; maslow, 1968; may, 1983).

Questioning of Self

all participants acknowledged multiple moments and, in some cases, periods of time in which they questioned their selves. This questioning included, to a certain extent, an uncertainty in participants’ abilities as professional counselors, a “not being capable.” although this questioning is related to the acknowledgment of their personal limitations described previously, the

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questioning of abilities seemed to be beyond just the acknowledgment of capabilities. These feelings of incapability included a fear of others’ percep- tions. One participant stated, “i didn’t want my classmates to judge me,” and this fear lead to a reluctance to speak up and share concerns in class and supervision. at the same time, there seemed to be a deeper questioning, an uncertainty in their value as individuals. They described the importance of “feeling valued” but also not wanting “to burden people with my shit.” This devaluing of the self led to additional anxiety because participants described reluctance to address the questioning with supervisors and peers.

may (1983) noted the anxiety generated from living an inauthentic life, one in which the value of the self is rooted in the perceptions of others. He described this as a form of social conformity rather than an authentic encounter with another. although individuals exist within a social world, the inner nature is not a product of this world. according to may (1983), self-esteem is present when individuals engage in authentic relationships, which allows for the presence of their potentialities as well as their limitations.

Worry

Worry differs from the existential anxiety described by maslow (1968) be- cause it is not related directly to the realities of human suffering; instead, worry seems to be a consuming concern. One participant stated, “i just kept thinking.” The consuming thoughts were related to self-doubt and seemed always to be with participants. maslow (1968) listed effortlessness as one of the values of being. He described this as “ease; lack of strain, striving or difficulty; grace; perfect, beautiful functioning” (p. 83). This effortlessness was present as a result of the participants’ connection with being and awareness of the value of the unique self, including potenti- alities and limitations. in other words, this worry prevented participants from engaging in the encounter (may, 1983) with the client by generating a defense to the awareness of nonbeing that the encounter might reflect.

Loneliness

Loneliness is a concept typically associated with existential ideas, so it was not surprising to hear a variety of themes of loneliness. Throughout the interviews, participants used words such as isolated, shut down, and alone to describe their experiences in practicum and internship. One participant described that she “always felt a little alone.” These feelings were compli- cated by the perceptions that peers “didn’t seem as worried as me,” which lead to increased worry and questioning of self. Participants noted being left to work on their own, and they seemed to wrestle with experiencing au- tonomy and independence in their work versus missing out on something that occurs within relationships, particularly relationships with peers and supervisors. One participant noted the importance of the acceptance that

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“i’m alone in the world.” This concept of loneliness was particularly present in the counseling relationship because participants described feelings of loneliness despite being in intimate counseling relationships with clients. One participant described the moment he realized this in a group counsel- ing session: “i was the one sitting in the room, and they were all looking at me.” Participants seemed to be struggling with the realities of aloneness, which maslow (1968) described in the following way:

The existentialist stress on the aloneness of the individual is a useful reminder for us, not only to work out further concepts of decision, or responsibility, of choice, of self-creation, of autonomy, of identity itself. it also makes more problematic and more fascinating the mystery of communication between alone-nesses via, e.g., intuition and empathy, love and altruism, identification with others, and homonomy in gen- eral. We take these for granted. it would be better if we regarded them as miracles to be explained. (p. 14)

Participants reflected the paradox of feeling lonely while engaged in the intimate relationship between counselor and client.

Relationships With Program Faculty

Participants reported that counselor education faculty provided some mediation for the existential anxiety counselors-in-training experienced. They described the importance of having trusting relationships with fac- ulty, particularly faculty they looked up to or with whom they felt they had a stronger relationship. in addition, participants noted the value in the trusting the training they had received from program faculty. Finally, they noted that program faculty were able to normalize their experiences. One participant described this as “normalizing nerves”; however, in reference to the previously mentioned themes, this idea might be better described as normalizing actually being real and worry, or the existential anxiety that can lead to change and growth for the supervisee. it should be noted that participants focused on program faculty in the teaching role, but there was no mention of site or university supervisors.

Relationships With Program Peers

Relationships with peers in their respective programs was another medi- ating factor for participants. in the previously mentioned themes related to individual experiences, participants described, across themes, multiple times in which they were reluctant to share these experiences with peers, which increased their anxiety. One participant described the appreciation of “just having [peers] around from time to time,” acknowledging that, in some cases, the simple presence of others who were going through the same process, even if the experience itself was not addressed, provided some relief from the anxiety. at times, however, it was important to hear another’s experience to know that others were having similar experiences.

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Overwhelmed With the Burden of Being Myself

a common theme was developed that seemed to be interwoven in the previously described experiences. Throughout the interviews, participants described the vulnerable experience of discovering their authenticities and integrating them into their personal and professional lives. They acknowledged the importance of this discovery and a desire to be fully present with clients in session. at the same time, this genuine presence required effort and work that seemed burdensome for participants, which increased feelings of anxiety and emotional burden. These aspects of par- ticipants’ experiences reflect their anxiety related to the encounter of life’s seriousness and their responsibility for meaning in the lives. They began to experience the anxiety and joy of the authentic encounter with another individual through the counselor–client relationship. These experiences forced participants to begin the personal work of awareness of the authentic self and acceptance of responsibility for their choices, particularly as they related to being genuine in the counseling session.

iMPLiCations

a more thorough understanding of the phenomenological experiences of counselors-in-training has implications for the training of professional counselors. Because participants did not acknowledge having their ex- istential experiences addressed in supervision and the mention of both university and site supervisors was minimal in all interviews, these implications appear to be particularly important during the supervision of counselor trainees.

Transition in the Existential Experience

The existential experiences described by participants seemed to be height- ened during moments of transitions. Transitions took a variety of forms, and often participants increased simultaneous transitions. For some participants, a move to a new placement seemed to generate increased awareness of the existential for the counselor trainee. changes in placement can occur for variety of reasons: a shift in requirements from practicum to internship, a need for different experiences, or incongruence between the site and the trainee. Heightened awareness of existential experiences seemed to be pres- ent for participants regardless of the reason for the transition to a new site.

although no assessment of the developmental level of participants was conducted, the existential seemed to be brought to the forefront for par- ticipants during times of developmental transition. From an integrated developmental model perspective, as counselors develop, their needs from supervisors will change, resulting in a shift in the responsibilities placed on the counselor as well as a shift in the relationship with the supervisor

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(stoltenberg et al., 1998). as participants described these relational changes, particularly in not receiving as much feedback as they had previously, anxiety related to their personal limitations and responsibilities increased, which, in turn, increased their awareness of the existential self.

Finally, personal transitions affected participants’ awareness of existential experiences. These transitions included changes in living arrangements as well as changes in personal relationships with significant others. in addition, all participants noted that their professional counseling training caused a shift in their personal relationships. Hazler and Kottler (2005) also described this shift in personal relationships that occurs for many counselors-in-training during their graduate studies.

Supervision Considerations

The acknowledgment of existential experiences and, in some cases crises, for counseling supervisees poses a challenge to the supervisor. This challenge is addressing the developmental needs of the supervisee while simultaneously supporting the supervisee through the existential experiences. in addition, an emphasis on the existential experiences of supervisees during supervision would require supervisees to place greater importance on the personalization skills of supervisees. These skills then could lead to greater awareness regarding intervention and conceptualization skills, as the supervisee’s awareness of the encounter is enhanced.

as previously noted, there seems to be a growing emphasis on interven- tion and conceptualization skills in supervision. This emphasis was evident in the literature and in the fact that the participants did not acknowledge that their existential experiences were addressed in supervision, which is possibly due to the recent emphasis on evidenced-based practices and interventions. at the same time, addressing personalization skills often requires supervisors to step into the counselor role. in doing so, supervisors must ensure that, although increased self-awareness and understanding are some of the purposes of supervision, the supervision process must always be directed toward the development of counselors-in-training and their counseling practice and not become personal counseling for the supervisee (Bernard, 1997).

Group supervision provides one avenue for addressing these experiences. supervisors can emphasize some therapeutic factors of universality, altruism, installation of hope, cohesiveness, existential factors, catharsis, interpersonal learning, and self-understanding related to these experiences (Yalom & Leszcz, 2005). Positive relationships with peers and faculty provided some means of coping with the existential experiences described by participants. Providing counselors-in-training opportunities in group supervision to develop these personalization skills would allow for increased cohesion and sharing of similar experiences.

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supervisors also might consider using certain theoretical approaches to support supervisees’ growth through these existential experiences. Given that phenomenology is an integral part of existential theory, theoretical approaches that integrate a phenomenological framework seem most ap- propriate. may (1983) addressed some considerations for counselors using an existential approach, and supervisors can integrate his perspectives in the supervision process. Others have explored the use of experiential ap- proaches in supervision (connell, 1984; cummings, 1992; Osborn, Danin- hirsch, & Page, 2003; Pierce & Diambra, 2010). The integration of experiential approaches could allow supervisees to explore personalization skills and address the impact these skills and experiences are having on their profes- sional development, including their work with clients.

Future Research

This study is the first i know of to specifically explore the existential experiences of counselors-in-training. although an initial understanding of these experiences was provided in this study, additional knowledge is necessary to understand the function of these experiences in the de- velopment of the professional counselor. counseling supervisors would benefit from an additional understanding of the role that existential anxiety plays with the other anxieties experienced by counselors-in- training. in addition, information regarding best practice for addressing existential experiences in supervision is needed, particularly considering that participants never described that these experiences were addressed in supervision or how they were addressing them on their own.

ConCLusion

The purpose of this study was to explore the existential experiences of counseling supervisees in the practicum and internship experiences. using a phenomenological approach, five counselors-in-training were interviewed regarding the existential experiences they had during their practical train- ing requirements. Participants described a variety of existential experiences related to their professional development, but none of the participants indicated that these experiences were addressed in supervision. These re- sults open the door for further exploration regarding the existential experi- ences of counselors-in-training, the role and function of these experiences in counselor development, and how supervisors can support supervisee growth through these experiences.

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