25 May Civility Problem
Professor P.M. Forni is the Director of the Johns Hopkins University Civility Project.
I heartily recommend his book “Choosing Civility: The Twenty-Five Rules of Considerate Conduct”. Some of his observations apply to our course, but all apply to living in society.
Many inexperienced negotiators believe civility and consideration are handicaps to achieving a successful outcome. They believe they can obtain what they want by being “tough”, which may manifest itself as rude, discourteous and impolite.
Nothing could be further from the truth.
You can be cool and dispassionate. You can be more formal than casual. But you need to show respect to all parties.
Whether we are engaged in negotiating or not we should be promoting civility. It is, after all, the cornerstone of civilization.
When we lessen the burden of living for those around us – we are doing well. When we add misery – we are not.
Do a simple kindness every day. And refrain from doing something unkind.
The quality of our lives depends on the quality of our relationships.
Would you agree?
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